By Miranda Fraraccio

I am not a storyteller. Not in the traditional sense, at least. 

I would describe myself as an introvert who fakes it as an extrovert. I get tired when I’m in a conversation too long due to my own overthinking and nervousness, as I constantly convince myself that I must be boring the person I’m talking with. I never feel like I have a profound enough story to tell. Or rather, I don’t feel I have a keen enough sense of my own experiences to know which events I could string together to make an entertaining story. 

The first time I had to tell a full 5-minute story, I was standing in front of a room of about thirty peers in my college storytelling course. I was dreading this day, feeling sick to my stomach and paralyzed with nerves as I waited for the professor to call my name to present. I had practiced for days prior, telling my story to friends and replaying my lines over and over in my head. But just as I was about a quarter of the way through, I suddenly blanked. “Crap,” I thought to myself, “What the hell comes next in the story…” I had been recounting the story of Oedipus and all of the sudden, I couldn’t remember my next lines. I stood there for a while before my nerves got the best of me. I know a performer is supposed to just push through, but I couldn’t help it.

I began profusely apologizing, “Oh, god. I forgot, I’m so sorry” as my face turned tomato red. I could see it in my peer’s faces- some found this entertaining, some were still hungover from the night before and couldn’t care less, a few offered sympathetic smiles and tried to silently encourage me. However, none of that mattered as my nerves clouded my mind and all I could think of was how my grade was going to tank. I vaguely remember finishing the story, before quickly sitting down and trying to forget about what happened. 

So, no. I’m not a traditional storyteller. But, that doesn’t mean I can’t participate in the art. I share my stories in a different way, through my photography and through writing. I share the stories through my photos, depicting a scene by the subject, the shapes, and the structure of a photo. And in writing, I can be as open or as broad as I want. The words are mine to decide. I have found ways to showcase my story, without having to worry about my mind going blank and reliving that day back in college. My work is curated to tell a story for me. Through pieces of writing, through projects and different photo series, I’m able to express myself in a way that still pushes me out of my comfort zone, but in a way I can manage.

And for the record, the next time I got up in front of the class to tell a story, I made it through my entire story without blanking- a little victory. Maybe, just maybe, I am a storyteller after all.